Malay songs back then

I felt like listening to Malay traditional songs

and I started to listen to Dikir Puteri by Noraniza Idris and

it led me Hati Kama by Siti Nurhaliza feat Noraniza Idris

and I clicked Nirmala song by Siti Nurhaliza.

I am in love with this song.

Malay songs back then had so much of lessons 

and they're great songs.

I can't comment on their musics and melody

because I am not an expert in this field.

But all in all, those songs never get old to me.

These lines slapped me hard.

Sesungguhnya berkasihlah
Di antara manusia
Perindah segala kata-kata
Bahagia itu janjinya

Mengapa kita sengketa
Rentaslah jalan terbuka
Tanpa dusta

It holds so much of lesson,

about the world that we're facing now.

If people are continuing to produce these kind of songs,

I am pretty sure, in a way, we manage to shape a better generation.

No no, I am not a doctor

Someone said, if I were a doctor,
I will be the strict one,
haha well I will be.

I will force people to take care of their health,
but I won't do the same hahaha.

My parents and my grandparents keep on
complaining to me,
why am I not a doctor?

Well,
I had enough of biology.
I don't really like that subject,
I prefer physics.

Being a doctor is such a noble job,
you'll help people and etc.
But I wouldn't want to be a doctor for
my entire life.

I want to have my own business.
I want to do something that I love.

Wait,
I don't know what I want -.-'
I know, but I am not clear
of my path to get there.

Rule of A Gentleman

This is one of my favourite.

I have another 379 rules that I agree with :P

How I see myself

I can be very reserved and talk to only certain people.
I may look friendly but I can be unfriendly too.

I mean,
I choose to open up to only certain people.

If you're the chosen one,
you're very lucky :)

Business

I've deactivated (in 30 days it will officially be deleted)

my twitter.

For business purposes,

you may email me at this address.

aliahnazarudin@yahoo.com

Social Networking Sites

At times,
you wouldn't want to get exposed to
the public.
It's not because of I don't like people.
It's just that,
the society nowadays could be too judgmental
and believe in false facts
and tend to be really stupid
for making small issues, big.

Ugh.
I am tired of reading people's
argument at the comment sections,
acting like they're so intelligent.

No,
I am not saying I am that smart
or genius,
I just think that
there's better medium to channel
your thoughts.

Stop acting stupidly.
People are laughing on us, Malaysians.

All the boys and the girls

"Relationship is meant for two,

and some people just do not know 

how to count."

 Oh well, I can teach you how to.

When Peter Pan took Wendy to Neverland,

the mermaids were mad at Wendy,

Tiger Lily was flirting with Peter Pan and Wendy was truly jealous 

and refused to talk to Peter Pan for a while and Tinker Bell just kept on wanting

to divert Peter Pan's attention away from Wendy,

do you feel the kind of pain when you watched that?

Guess what,

you don't.  

Because you're either Tiger Lily, Tinker Bell or those mermaids.

I am Wendy,

that's why I understand.

And deep in our heart,

we all know, 

Peter Pan will always choose Wendy.

I am very thankful for that.

Rejection oh wow

I hardly face rejection.

I don't face rejection all this while because
I constantly close my heart from
having to forget the things I've forgiven.

And today,
when I choose to let go of my anger and sadness,
and get things better than before,
someone just closed the heart from
accepting that.

It's me to be blamed.

Rejection does hurt,
so badly.

Oh wow,
I'm impressed.

10 Tips To Know

This isn't a TOK article where
I would tell you all the ways of knowing
and areas of knowledge.

This isn't a typical article on how to blablabla,
no it isn't.

I screwed up.

And I am sorry.

I know my "I'm sorry" won't heal the pain,
but yeah that's what my heart is saying all this while.

I am just overly sensitive and that harms me.
That truly sickens my life and I just have to get rid of it.

And so,
I read loads of articles,
on how to assure myself,
that I still belong to someone's heart.

I'm reading ways to heal my green eyes,
that's insane, right?

Yeah, I am putting effort to heal
this virus.

"If one constantly wants to choose someone as the other half,
no matter how big the argument you've been having to deal with,
stay."

And this is what I have been holding on,
all this while.

Tom Yam o Tom Yam

Last nite, the game was so intense.
Malaysia vs Thailand.

Malaysia fought hard,
we won the match,
but we lost by aggregate
and so we lost the cup.

Till the 80th minute,
Malaysia led by 3 points,
then the last 10 minutes,
Thailand just buckled up so
well, the scored 2 points,
made them win by 1 aggregate.

So close to win, right?

That's life.
Somehow, I want to take my life
in Thailand perspective and
take my life lesson from Malaysia perspective.

The lesson is,
to strive for your best,
every time.
So you won't feel regret when you're
that close to victory.

The life part is,
you should always
believe in yourself and
keep striving and never lose hope.

Even if you think,
you don't have the chance to win anymore.

Because the truth is,
what you know, is bounded by what you think you know.

Allah knows best.

source : only I know

Result Day-ay-ay

The feeling when you're having breakfast
while scrolling twitter and you saw people
tweeting about sem 3 results and whoosh
I lost appetite, in fact I lost my appetite for the whole day.

I checked my result and my heart broke to pieces.
I'm so frustrated with my result,
people might say
there're always people getting worse than me,
but for my personal satisfaction,
I don't feel satisfied at all.

I dropped three points as compared to last semester
and I am so mad at myself for not scoring my
chemistry paper and I also do not get 7 for econs.

I mean,
ugh.

People are cheering for something they've longed for,
I know.

Guess,
that's all from me in my mourning session.

I'm done with semester 3.
I'm gonna show you
at least of 40 points for my IB.

Safe Heaven

I've always loved it when Nicholas Sparks novel
became a movie.

And I love Safe Heaven more
because a part of it is just so related to me.

Well,
I have a thing on letter.
Writing letters to people,
for them to read after I died,

I might have a thing on it,
but I wouldn't want it to happen.
I don't want to die when people
around me need me,
But we'll never know when death would come, right?

No,
I won't tell what I feel,
entirely about the movie here
because I've promised myself
to share it with someone else first.
But he seems to be too sleepy to listen
to my story :P
(Post-gym session effect)

Okay,
next time :)

Exam fever is not over bae

I am gonna get my Semester 3 results in 3 days,
I know it will not be as good as last sem's results,
as much as I want it to be a good one.

I am such a silly girl,
for not reading well the Alberta requirement,
they need me to have outstanding sem 1,2,3 results
and IB exam ofc.

This is extra scary.

But yeah, we shall not look back and mourn about it,
because truth is, life goes on.

I have approximately 1 week to settle all my homework
and study, which I know I can't do them all.

I need to study PHYSICS,
I screw up like shit.

Out of all those shitty regrets I feel,
I am more regretful when I tend to be ignorant.

AS is so soon,
and I didn't know about it, that's awful.

I should have studied together
and not only dreamed of things
that we wish to happen.

Miracles do happen but only for once,
or twice.

I need to study hard and work hard.
We need to study hard and work hard.

Now,
we shall build bridge that leads us
to a brighter future.

Tourists

You know you're special when someone would treat you

ice cream just to say sorry for the mistakes he made :)

I like this picture because the red building behind us

made the picture look extra HD

and we both agreed to nominate this as the picture of the day yeah!

Only God knows when will be the next time we're gonna meet.

Anyhow, LDR isn't that bad after all.

#imnotalwayssentimentallikethis

#pardonmysweetness

I am scared

I am scared when people are mad at me,
at times I can be very childish,
so I tend to take everything so lightly,
but in fact, it matters most to everyone else.

I am scared of losing someone
I love for the mistakes I've made,
because sometimes I take everything so seriously
and get hurt over silly stuff.

I am scared, it makes me cry.
And today,
I cry so badly.

I have never cried and sobbed till that extent of weeping.

It's all because I'm scared.

I am sorry.

A little

Never doubt someone for his good intention,
never ask someone to change herself just to suit your lifestyle.

Never have trust issue with yourself,
never promise things you can't fulfil.

Cause if you do, if I do,
our hearts will break,
a little.
Or a lot.

Malay novel

I have nothing against Malay novels,

I just hardly read them except 

if that's teacher's task.

Based on what people told me,

the summary of the novels they read,

I think,

the stories are quite okay,

I mean pretty much related to my life,

as Malay,

but the story line was a bit cliche (for some novels)

ie, 

rich and poor, fall in love,

they're not allowed to get married because of social status.

or

they are forced to get married.

But I guess, cliche wasn't really the most accurate word,

I use cliche cause I have no other vocab to describe it.

I guess, 

that's the social norm among Malays,

and I don't blame the writers for having that idea,

as we tend to write what's on our mind

and what we think is shaped by the surrounding.

Oh well.

I guess my story might be a bit cliche in a sense,

I fall for the one I used to hate.

But guess what?

The story is spectacular, extra-ordinary.

I am so gonna have those lines to promote my novel, hahaha.

A curse or a gift, in the making.

Stay tune.

2015 Resolutions, whoops!

My 2015 resolution is just as big as the world.

First, I have 4 months to go before my final IB exam.

I will just do whatever it takes to get a minimum of 40 points,

for my IB exam.

Next, 

I will make sure myself getting placement in Canadian university,

and fly off in August (cannot wait, I am so excited!)

I would also want to get extra and special scholarships from the university, yeay!

As much as I know, 

I will cry so badly at the airport,

when my family has to send me off,

and I will be in a long distance relationship

with the British boy, 

I just have to stay strong, it's for my brighter future!

Oh well,

I also want to spend more time with my family (and plus one),

and create remarkable memories with them all.

2015 Raya,

I want to go to my friends' houses weeeee!

While waiting for IB results,

I will learn how to cook variety of Malay cuisines,

for my own benefit in the future.

I would also plan to have

a fashion blog for petite girls,

(cause you see, they hardly embrace petite girls, 

only tall girls got the attention, that's really unfair!)

When I reach Canada,

I will spend my weekend going to travel around the place

I've stayed,

and include that in my travel blog.

For a longer break,

I will travel to different states

and maybe have a short getaway to the USA!

I wish to score every exam, so I will add up savings!

Oh well, 

I need to save because after my graduation,

I will have to buy house, car, give my parents money,

get married!

So many commitments are ahead, I cannot screw up.

What more?

Oh I will send postcard back home

and to the British boy, heh.

I am just too excited!

Do this, for living!

Suddenly, everything clicks.
I was just going through the net, finding things that
would make me forget all the pain I felt inside my bone.
Then I just had a wonderful and brilliant idea on what to do for living.

I like blogging.
I like taking pictures.
I like editing videos.
I want to travel around the world, so badly.

Can't you see, the perfect inductive (or deductive I can't really differentiate) logic here.

People!
I will definitely have a travel blog (or vlog if I have extra time,
knowing I am an engineering student ftw!)

You see,
I don't want to be a whole time engineer,
talking to machines and invent new things for the rest of my life!

I want to see wanders,
I want to witness God's creations around the world,
I want to travel!

The resolution of me being an engineer, will definitely
be there, since I need money to travel.

So,
here's to a brighter future!

Wedding Planning

It scared me yesterday when my parents were having serious conversation
regarding my wedding.
I mean, hello parents, I am not even 20 and I haven't finished my IB Programme,
I am certainly not ready for this matter, naayy no way.

I always talk about my wedding theme and wedding preparation
and honeymoon places, but not a serious discussion about it.

Before I get married I need to have :
-Future husband
-Degree
-At least a condominium, or any type of house to live in
-A car (I have my own preference here)
-RM50k in my bank account
-Given my parents some big amount of money
-A job
*Arrangement is not in order*

And based on the lists above, I only have the first one.
So I have 6 years to get all the things done.
6 more years to go!

Alberta and New Brunswick!

I have received email from these unis,
and they mentioned that my results are outstanding enough to be admitted to their unis,
which is indeed a great blessing for me.
Now, I have to post my hard copy official transcript from college
in order to get my official offer letter!

So many procedures for the university application,
I almost give up in the midst of application process,
but peeps, don't ever ever give up on your dream!

I don't really mind which uni will accept me or not,
I only need one official unconditional offer to secure my future,
anyhow, I still have my own preference here.
Haha, favouritism may not get out of my way I presume *wink*

LAter!

Plan

I have so many plans, like lists of plans that I want to do through out my life,
but if Allah has better plans for me, I will accept them, whole heartedly :)

Getaway :D

I've spent my weekend with my ultimate family.
We didn't exactly plan our weekend getaway, it's just spontaneous.
We went to PD for a short time, just to take pictures and entertain Adlina with
her crab finding.
And we made our way to funfair and ride on swing,
 I wasn't expected the swing to be spinning that fast.

And today, we're in Putrajaya, going to IOI Mall and the place was
damn crowded, and so we made a way to Alamanda and had Chakri tom yam for lunch.
Oh yeah, tom yam is on me!

When I was in PD, it made me thinking.
I was so close, yet so far away from Peter Pan.
What a sad time, of being in the same place
but not getting the chance to meet.

And I merengek about it to my mum till now.
The kind of regret that I feel, when I didn't fight for a short meeting.
It's not that I didn't want to, but I just didn't know
how to estimate time.
When to meet, can we meet, do we have ample time for that?

I am hoping for the best.


May we have the chance to meet, some time during this holiday.

University

My life gets extra hectic these days because I am so busy with the university application.
I mean, hell yeah I will be busy next year with my
Intensive Revision Program (IRP, like how Kolej Mara Banting students usually call that).
So, I decide to settle everything now.

And so these are the universities that Yayasan would allow me to apply for.

The universities are arranged in order. 

I want to get university placement so badly.

#HopingforabetterSem3Result

My deceiving green eyes

"Those who get jealous easily, are those who care so much."

-unknown

I get jealous easily, like super easily

and it happens to this one particular person only haha!

So, what does it mean?

Sem 3 is o-o-ver!

Semester 3 was a dying semester, I tell you.
I broke down for almost, everyday and life was not full of happiness at all.
You know, when they say about having rainbow after the rain, nayy it wasn't the case
for me, as the rainbow was hiding behind the black clouds, all the time.
Guess the rainbow will only come after my IB Results.
And semester 3 was also the phase where I went out like all the time,
because of my stress, I just need an escapade.
And I know whom I can turn to, you know what I mean.

My family helps a lot, like a lot.

And so, this post is a special to thank all those people that help me
 surviving IB for the third semester :)